Friday, February 22, 2013

Sh*t Happens

Yesterday, something really shitty happened. I was already having a tough week, with my mystery illness and waiting for the insurance company to approve the MRI on my brain. I was feeling lonely and frustrated at not being able to do much and not seeing or even hearing much people I'd really hoped would reach out while I was going through all of this.

So yesterday, I decided to make myself get out of the house for a bit and go to my favorite cafe. It's kind of my safe haven - everyone knows me there. It's almost like being in a small town where people know what your order is automatically, know your habits, etc. But yesterday that changed. While at the cafe, my wallet got stollen - complete with license, credit cards, debit cards, insurance card, AAA card, the little cash I had on me, etc. I will say, I'm thankful it was just my wallet, and not my whole purse with my phones, meds, and everything else. But still, I had no ID, the thief drained my checking account, ran up my credit cards, all within an hour or so. It clearly wasn't an accidental "I dropped my wallet and someone decided to help themselves to $10 in cash". I was targeted. At a place I trust. What's worse is, my purse was next to me on the chair the entire time. I did once go up to the counter to get a coffee refill, but it was a total of maybe a minute, max, and the counter was about three feet from my table. It wasn't a one-off situation. The person knew what they were doing, waited for the window of opportunity, and literally cashed in.

Yes, I was furious and had severe anxiety about losing the money, the ID, everything. But what bothers me more is that I feel violated. A place that felt secure to me no longer does. What if that person is there again? Are there more people there that would do the same thing? I'm not a naive or overly trusting person. In fact, I'm the opposite. I'm a bit over-protective and paranoid about my things, and I have severe trust issue with just about everybody, thanks to several issues from my past. So it's not like I was sitting there with my purse wide open, leaving my wallet out for all to see and learned my lesson about life in the big city. Rather, I was already overly-cautious and I'm a bit afraid I'll become downright neurotic about my belongings and my trust in general.

I did learn a very valuable lesson yesterday. Nobody and no place is immune. I live in a very nice part of the city, I was at a trusted place where I know a lot of people and people generally watch out for each other, and I am very careful about the security of my things. Never the less, the thief got me. All in all, if I'm going to be a victim of a crime, it could be way worse. Thank goodness it wasn't a violent crime. I wasn't robbed at gunpoint or mugged. I didn't even realize my wallet was missing until about an hour after it happened - after all I had no reason to check, as my purse was with me basically the entire time.

They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, and I'm still standing (or sitting), so I guess some day, I'll look back on this week as one of those that made me tougher and more able. For now, I'm going to be extra vigilant, and try to work through my already rather severe trust issues, so that I can get past this in a healthy way and move on. 


  1. So sorry, Maya! Some days, weeks, years, decades (?) we all can get a bit tired of that "what doesn't kill you..." saying. Keep up the good fight and know you are not alone! :)

    1. Thank you, Margo! I agree with you 100%. The one good thing is when you have a really rough time, you figure that it has to go up! My last week and a half or so has been, knock on wood, a good deal better! I hope that trend continues.