I recently read an article entitled "How To Grow Close By Asking the Right Questions". While the post is intended for dating or at least getting to know someone new one on one, it got me thinking about the ways in which we do actually size people up, and how well people actually know us. I think the way we answer questions, at least questions that go slightly deeper than surface level, says a lot about us, and I became curious as to my own answers. So I answered the questions for myself, at least the ones that didn't require back and forth rapport with another party that was supposed partake for purposes of "growing close". I found that more than a few of them made me actually pause and reflect. I also thought it might be interesting for my readers to see my answers, and for me to learn some of theirs, if they chose to share. I'm always up for a study in people, and this seemed to provide a good platform for one. Below are the questions, copied word for word, along with some of my answers. Curious how you'd answer? Play along!
Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
Assuming they mean a famous person, or at least someone who wouldn't normally come to dinner such as a loved one, this answer was easy: the Dalai Lama.
Would you like to be famous? In what way?
No, unless I was well known for doing some sort of charity or philanthropic work, but not in any other way. I don't like attention or limelight focused on me.
Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
Absolutely, unless it's to a loved one or close friend. I have phone anxiety.
What would constitute a perfect day for you?
Time with my loved ones doing something carefree and without set rules, most likely exploring some place new.
When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
All the time. Probably 10 minutes ago. Does my dog count as "someone else"? I sing to her daily.
If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
My mind. I know what it's like to feel like you can't control your mind momentarily. I can't imagine 60 years of that.
Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Nada. Despite my tendency for foresight and premonition dreams, I don't have a clue. And I don't want to.
For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
Family and friends. No doubt about it.
If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Not a thing. Though I wish I myself had been a bit more daring, but that's no fault of my upbringing.
If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
Better confidence/self-esteem. I don't want superpowers (though teleportation would be cool). I just want to wake up every day believing in myself.
If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Nothing. Life's an adventure, meant to be lived out and adjusted to as it comes along. It freaks me out enough when I have premonition dreams. I want no part of a crystal ball, unless it would help me help loved ones somehow.
Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
A round-the-world trip. Why not? Money, and responsibilities in my life here. But I'll do it one day!
There are plenty more questions that I plan to answer in another blog. In the meantime, I'd love to hear some of your answers, so feel free to comment!
Interesting exercise. I'm taking a shot at it in full knowledge that no one answers questions that they know others will see the answers to in the same way they would if they were to remain forever private. Rather than recopying each question, I'm simply numbering them and hope it makes sense that way.
ReplyDelete1. Do they have to be someone living? If not, I’d say my father because there are so many questions about his life that I would love to ask him but never got a chance to.
2. Not famous, but recognized for making a contribution. I think that anyone who has worked in a field for a long time would like recognition from their colleagues or those who are trying to accomplish the same thing.
3. Yes, if it has to do with formal business where I need to communicate specific information or get a problem solved. I’m, terrible at remembering what I intended to say on the fly.
4. To me perfection is illusionary, so it would depend upon how I felt on a given day. One day it might be getting in the car and driving wherever I wanted. On another, it might be a Thanksgiving with my entire family.
5. Today. The last time I sang to someone else was when I was with my grandkids a few weeks ago.
6. This is a trick question. Having the mind of a thirty year old would mean giving up more than half of what I’ve become as an adult, so I wouldn’t chose that, but becoming senile and being left with only the body of a thirty year old would be much to look forward to, either.
7. If I had to put my money on one thing, it would be choking since I do that a lot lately, but really I have neither premonitions nor nightmares about it.
8. That I wake up each day to a new day and can look back with gratitude for what I’ve had.
9. To change anything significant about how I was raised would be to change me as well, so I wouldn’t make the change, though I would change the some of the cards my parents were dealt with in having to raise us.
10. To be able to be less selfish so that I could close the gap between my ideals and actions.
11. There is much that I want to know but I would never look because then knowledge would become destiny.
12. Yes, there are many things, but to quote Simon and Garfunkel, “Everything looks worse in black and white”. So I’m glad just to have my Kodachrome.
Thanks for your answers! And you are right on question 6, I wouldn't want to give up all the wisdom I'd gain over the years, nor would I want to have a young body but lose my mind - though some days I feel that way now! :-)
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