Ever since I was a kid, I've had a crazy imagination. My particular imagination, though, never seemed to serve much purpose. I mean, it's fun to look at someone walking along the street and make up a whole back story about them that you share with your friends for a laugh (honestly, I do this - I could write a novel in my head about people I see while sitting at a cafe with my coffee). Really, though, where does that get you? It's fun, but it's not particularly fulfilling, unless of course it's a really attractive man that you decide is single, interesting, and interested. I'm kidding. Kind of. In all seriousness though, I always thought my imagination was a distraction more than anything.
A few months ago, something began to shift. I started to feel restless. I began experiencing this strong desire to release my creativity and imagination. The restlessness came from not knowing how. Blogging does help. It allows me to delve into my brain and bring forth what I'm thinking without concern for meeting others' image of me. Allowing myself to honestly view my own brain, I've realized I'm even more "off beat" and imaginative than I thought I was. I'll be honest - I've also learned that I don't mind this at all. It turns out that, while I'm still ridiculously organized and scientific, I'm not so lopsidedly left-brained after all. I've somehow squelched this imagination and creativity all the this time. Still, frustration comes from the inability to use any physically artistic or creative methods as an outlet. It's like a jumbled mess in there when it comes to this other side of my brain. I know something really creative, imaginative, and probably downright weird is lurking in there. I just have no idea what it is.
I'm on a mission to discover this. I sometimes wonder if I'm still a little afraid to express it for fear of being even more "different" than I already am, and this is what is subconsciously holding it back - my condition is already odd enough to explain. I think, however, that shell is starting to crumble, which feels like a very good thing. Maybe it's confidence-related. As my confidence grows, I am able to tap into this imagination more, and when I'm ready, I'll know how to express it outwardly. At least I hope so.
Several people have suggested a couple of books that I plan to purchase when my "to read" stack has diminished slightly. Others have suggested mind-mapping, an idea which I love and need to do. Do you have any other suggestions or experiences? I'd be thrilled to hear them!